written by Jenny S.

What do Lena Miculek, American competitive shooter with 9 world titles in 5 different disciplines, and I have in common? I can easily rattle off many of the ways we’re different. I didn’t grow up as a “gun enthusiast,” shooting sports are not part of my DNA, and firearms, in general, have historically made me uncomfortable. So, how did Lena find common ground with me in just a few seconds? She shared the following words of wisdom:

“Fear is a liar. It’s a thief of life, and it will take all that you let it.”

Over the last few years, I’ve dedicated incredible energy to exploring my own fears. I have investigated their root cause, figured out what fuels them, and learned how to counter them, in order to live more confidently and happily. Lena’s perspective really resonated with me. Fear is often based on the unknown. It is a feeling, a perception, an assumption. It is not a fact. How can we counter something that is so elusive? For me, the answer is with education and experience.

Recently, on a family vacation, I got the chance to test this theory. Despite growing up in a coastal city, I have never really felt comfortable near the ocean. Its powerful and unpredictable waves mystified me, and let’s not even discuss the unknown creatures living in the deepest and darkest of its abyss. So, when my husband suggested we take a family surf lesson, I quickly volunteered to stay by the shore, and take photos of their adventure from a safe distance. On the morning of the lesson, as we got to know the instructors, I was struck by what I saw. Yes, they really knew what they were doing on the water, but more importantly, the way they prioritized their students’ safety and education, gave me just enough courage to join them.

Was I nervous? So much so, that my entire body quaked with shivers the whole way into the deep water zone. Did that stop me? No. I fought my fear with education, and now it was time to bring in the experience. I relied on the lessons they taught us on the dryland, got out of my own way, and surprised even myself, when I stood up tall on the very first wave. And then I swam out and did it again. And again. And each time I awaited the wave, my heart pounded with the intoxicating cocktail of adrenaline and competence, as I grew more and more confident.

I would have easily missed out on the highlight of our family vacation, if I had trusted the lies in my fears.

What motivated me to take that leap of faith? The surfing instructors reminded me of my experience with Lady Sentinel, a women’s empowerment group centered on self-protection, much of which is with firearms training. Although I may not seem like the most likely member of Lady Sentinel, the dots are easy to connect. Since joining the group, I’ve learned about more prickly topics than I can count. I’ve shown up to just about every monthly session, even when the topics don’t seemingly appeal to me, and especially when they terrify me. Why have I done this? Because, like Lena, I recognized that my fears were not based on facts. And so, I leaned into the opportunity to learn with topnotch instructors who prioritize my safety, and value education. It is through this incredible training and real exposure, that I have since overcome a lifelong clinical phobia of firearms. Better yet, I’m part of a community of women who join me in these pursuits, and empower me to carry on those values in other areas of my life. Like surfing.

So, the next time you are wrestling with your own fears, channel your inner Lena Miculek, and look for the lies. Ask yourself if they are based on facts or feelings. Counter them with education and experience. Find the teachers who prioritize your safety. Then, get out of your own way. You may just find yourself riding a wave of newfound confidence.